I have to go away for just a little bit.
It's not you, it's me. Honest.
(Although while I'm away, by all means feel free to examine your constant, compulsive need to try and sell me things.)
Promise I'll come home all bouncy and refreshed and full of renewed appreciation for all things hot-shower and electronic-related. Perhaps in return you could think about that new world order Tessa requested? There has been alarmingly little raspberry jam of late.