In a comment to my last post, Liz pointed out a couple of fantastic articles.
One is Scott Westerfeld and Justine Larbalestier, who are the writers in residence on Inside A Dog at the moment, talking about writing together, and cutting close enough to the bone:
It helps a ton to have another writer in the house. I don't know how them solo writers do it. … Sometimes it's like being a cheering section, sometimes it's more about challenging the other when they're being lazy, and sometimes it's just pointing out little things, like the bit of celery that's stuck between Justine's teeth right now.
I don't think you can demand things of that part of the mind that really are to do with the real world, the actual world. You've got to let anything emerge and you've got to say okay, I do trust it, it will, in the end, be okay but I've got to let anything emerge. You can't go saying, oh I can't think that thought because that doesn't accord with my status in the world, or even what I believe in the world. You have to let the thoughts emerge of their own accord whatever they're like and that's why the shame, to come back to your earlier question. Because when you stop writing or thinking in this way and you walk away and you're in the actual world again and you're being the person you are, suddenly you think back to the wild things you were thinking and you feel oh, that's not the right way to think at all.