2011 July » Deborah Kalin

in a win for all future mornings, i did not go back to bed. but it took eating easter chocolate.

journal, writing life Comments Off

Jul 292011

Some days it takes every trick in the book to get up and sit down, even promising yourself that you don't have to write when you get there. (You're lying, and you know it. But you're counting on your inner perversity to carry that one through.)

Then there's days, like today, when you sleep through said every trick, and it takes more, it takes the panicked sting of adrenaline to get you going.

Then you find out your mother's flight has been cancelled. And she's arriving later. And you have time to spare now.

And you know this kind of 'reward' is only going to reinforce the bad behaviours.

whilesoever the second is true, it outweighs the first

journal, writing life 6 Responses »

Jul 252011

Things that suck about being a writer:

You can never find (enough) time to write.
You can never find (enough) time to get anything done as thoroughly as you'd like.
You carry a vague and incessant guilt with you everywhere, for: stealing time to write; not writing every second you find you have spare; promising yourself you'd get three pages but only managing two, or one; neglecting the vacuuming; neglecting your friends; insert reason here.
You don't understand the phrase "time off".
People will think you're joking about not understanding the phrase "time off".
Remuneration. Even if you get some, chances are it's so small it redefines the term "pittance".
Remuneration. Even if it's not a (writer's version of a) pittance, nobody but you will see the years of work that went into earning that apparently-impressive amount which is, on a dollar per hour basis, a pittance.
You compare yourself to other people in unrealistic — not to mention unhealthy — ways.
You cannot, even if you do write fast, write fast enough.
Loved ones will urge you to put off today's writing "just this once", blithely unaware that they are not the only ones urging that on any given day. You will blame yourself for the discord caused by saying no to them.
You have those days when you doubt not just your stories, but your very self. Because you've taken such a huge gamble, and wandered so far out the branch beneath you has turned into a twig, those doubts are damn scary ones.
You watch writers get published and writers fail to get published, and there is no pattern, no clear line that puts the good ones in one camp and the mediocre in the other. This is both terrifying and comforting. But mostly terrifying.

Things that are awesome about being a writer:

You write. It's incomparable.

The funny thing, it's not like I've been toying lately with the idea of not writing. Far from it! Oh, I've had my flirtations with that thought, in my time, but not lately. Yet this is the list that poured out when I sat down to the blog today.

I guess I needed the reminder.

social networking overload

journal, writing life 9 Responses »

Jul 182011

Croatia is, well, it's partially booked, and the rest of it is planned. That totally counts as progress. I'm going to be seeing Zagreb, the UNESCO listed Plitvice Lakes, and the Dalmatian coast. This strikes me as a most excellent way of spending some time.

This weekend I also managed to book my flights to America for WFC 2011. Yet more progress!

In more ephemeral progress, I've also been pondering the thornsome dilemma that is social media. There is, quite simply, too much of it.

I like blogging for the fact that it's my website, and my voice, and I like the space you get in blog posts, both writing them and reading them. Conversely, I like Twitter for its immediacy, and for its ephemeral, thrown-off nature. I don't like Facebook — too much noise to signal, and the platform makes it impossible to filter content from chatter. I have a Goodreads account, but I can't remember the last time I found time to log in. I'm on Google+, which I like better than Facebook if only for its more easily-accessible privacy and filtering utilities, but it does feel like yet another platform I'm supposed to keep up with. Yet another platform where I have to face the dilemma of whether I cross-post, and commit the sin of forcing people who are following me on more than the one platform to trawl through duplicate content, or whether I strive to come up with original content for just this platform…

It's frustrating, because I enjoy the interaction, but the time consumption and the fragmented concentration is simply too draining.

So I am hereby giving myself permission to say that two social media platforms is my limit. For now that's my blog, and twitter. I'll still lurk on the other platforms, but I won't be logging in unless they demand my attention.

I think this also counts as progress.

everything is overdue

journal 2 Responses »

Jul 112011

Somewhere along the way, it was forced to my attention that I'm leaving for Europe in two months' time. Well, at that point it was two months: it's now about six weeks. Do I have everything booked? No. Do I have anything booked? Well, sorta. A bit.

I'm also due to depart for the US about a week after I land back home in Aus, which means I should actually get everything for that second trip taken care of, um, now.

So, yeah, I've hit that stage of pre-travel when everything falls by the wayside while critical planning and booking errands get attended to. This is otherwise known as The Frustrating Yuck Bit.

On the other hand, last night I got to choose which bits of Slovenia I most want to see. So, since I very much enjoy making people envious of my travel plans (mostly because I get to travel so rarely, and spend so much of my intervening time being envious of everyone else's travel plans), I thought I would share.

And, although I couldn't find a commons-licensed picture quickly, I'm also going to the Tolmin Gorges, among others.

Then it will be on to Croatia. The planning of which, er, is tonight's errand. Right, yes, on to that then.

we interrupt this silence for a brief message

journal, the binding Comments Off

Jul 032011

I read somewhere once that it was terribly poor form to start a blog post with an apology for the silence. Now, whenever I feel I've let one too many days slip by without blogging, I'm paralysed for how to start, since apparently I can't start with an apology.

On such quibbling social anxieties my world turns.

Anyrate, at the risk of being passé, apologies for the silence. Life threw the pterosaur's family a bit of a curve ball, and I've been required offline lately. In fact, I'm currently stealing a quiet moment in the sewing room to dash this off from my phone (how did I ever live without the Internet on my phone?).

First, FREE STUFF!

There's an interview of me up at the blog of the fabulous Rowena, where I mostly talk about The Binding books, but also talk a little bit about other topics. There's also a chance to win a free copy of both Shadow Queen and Shadow Bound, simply by commenting. So if you've always wanted to read the books and never got around to it, head on over and leave a comment. Or, if you've already read the books but can think of someone who might enjoy them, send them linkwards!

Second, only partial self-promotion:

I came across a link to Gnod's Literature Map in my tweetstream. (If you'd like the link that led me there, it was via Publisher's Weekly, which link contains a brief explanation of how it works.)

It's an awesome idea for finding the next book to read, since us authors write so slowly and you readers read so swiftly!

Of course, since I am but a little Australian fledgeling, my name is not recognised in the literature map yet — so if you do happen to head over there, help a girl out by searching for me and, when the site displays the "I don't know this author", click the offered link to confirm I exist.

And while you're at it, add in some unknown antipodean authors like Rowena Cory Daniells, or Tansy Raynor Roberts, or Jo Anderton, or Karen Healey, to name but a handful. I've added them myself, but the site needs more than a single vote to believe it.

And now, I really must get back to the fray, so I leave you with 8 prehistoric creatures from your nightmares, to which the pterosaur would like me to add a ninth: YOUR SKULL, DEB.