For some reason, the scar on my cheek is burning burning burning today. Perhaps I am developing mutant powers at last? Here's hoping. (Dear mutating genes: I don't need invisibility — I've pretty much already perfected the art of not being noticed as it is. And mind-reading is right out, I really don't want to know what anyone else is thinking, it's quite noisy enough in my head as it is. Flying, on the other hand, would be awesome. Or maybe some sort of camouflage/chameleon schtick? Or even just telekinesis.)
Consequently (the logic of this thought progression makes no sense, even to me), I have decided it's time I shared with you my position on a few matters that are utterly trivial and can make no lick of difference to anyone, even me. Ready?
- Beards: In general, I don't like them. But this is because the vast majority of beards are dreadful. A good beard looks great — but a good beard is a lot of work, and it involves more finicky shaving than just shaving your face clean can ever involve. A good beard, as far as I'm concerned, is kept trimmed short, and doesn't grow up to your eyeballs and down to your shirt collar. A beard is for outlining your jaw, not for attempting to pass as some kind of human version of a woolly mammoth.
- Romantic Comedies: Constitute cruel and unusual punishment under the terms of the Geneva Convention, and should be outlawed. Misogynistic, patronising, and actively involved in setting up unhealthy role models of what a relationship should be. Give me giant exploding robots any day.
- HAN SHOT FIRST.
- This amused me. Mainly because any chart that puts me at the position of "least geekiest" is (apart from obviously leaving out a large portion of society) alright by me.
- I want piano stairs! Okay, not in my apartment block, because that corridor is plenty noisy enough already, but there needs to be more whimsy in urban design.